Theres always got to be that one boy...

Everyone knows what I'm talking about. That person who seems to have your heart wound up some other way than you're used to. Well for me, this one particular summer, it happens to be about a boy though known under numerous pretexts, most involving the oh so clever first letter of that first name in front of the last name genius of a nickname. For now lets call him Ben. Ben is smart. And can be funny, creative, and stubborn. He also has the capabilities of anger, cocky-ness, mooching, among others. Those faults used to be all I could see in him, back when school first started and my first roommates and I moved in together.

He moved in with us for a couple of months, his car was broken and he was in a tight spot with money. At 22 years old he didn't want to be in a crowded house with his dad and no bed. We used to fight, ohhh do we argue. But we were also friends. Not that anyone really noticed, they all assumed we just hated each other. Yet all those days having been left together we realized we had a lot in common; religious, political, philosophical, and moral issues. Then he moved to Ohio. Cincinnati to be exact. Oddly enough I have relatives that live there too, but I was never up there when he was.

Recently he came down for a visit, and ended up staying. Since he had left he had been apart of three relationships: one with a friend of mine from high school, another with one of my roommates, and the last with a girl from Louisiana. All were moved through his field quickly. I, of course, had been though none, but had been dealing with a lot when it came down to friends and family. We bonded again, quicker this time, and closer than before. Us and our friend of ours that had been staying with us even made up a group called "family" because we had been spending most of our time together. It really only been in the last week that I've been thinking I might like him.

Let me tell you about Ben. Scrawny. Ex owner of a jewfro. Computer geek. But he wears glasses that make him kind of adorable and he can fix my computer in a moments notice. He incredibly smart too, even though he hasn't really done the whole school thing, but you know its good that even though he's almost 23, he still wants to. He's into graphic design and computer repair, and he has this ability to keep friends. He can be so rude and uncaring. He acts as though he has no feelings and can hurt you with words at a moments notice, but he listens when I talk, and he always wants to help. He says thank you and goes shopping with me. And he sees me in all moods, dress, and in betweens and still remains close to me.

He's also moving to Colorado. And I'm moving to Tallahassee. But he said he'd pay to fly me out there, which melts my heart a little. And he tells me he misses me when I'm not around. And he texts to see if I'm ok, and understands me when I'm crazy. And lately there have been signs. None clear enough to use as evidence though. So here I sit, and wait. Hoping maybe we might be able to look at each other and know. I'd definitely like to try.